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Wednesday, 16 July 2008

Brick Wall

I haven't posted for a little while because I've been feeling like shit. The three ideas I offered to the BBC have all been rejected. But it's not just a quick 'no' - it's been a lot of to-ing and fro-ing and 'possiblies' and now 'NO'. I offered something on the back of a series I wrote last year. I've been working on it for a long time and did that thing of twisting myself inside out to give them what I thought they wanted. And it has been rejected on what feels like a whim. Along with two other things that they wanted, then they didn't want. I know it's not the end of the world. But right now I really feel like it is.

It would be great if my hide had grown a little tougher. But it hasn't. It's like the past few months have been a total waste of time.


Michael said...

I'm sorry, Jane. I know that feeling of working and revising something and then to be told 'no'. It feels rubbish. Treat yourself to a 'sod you' day - no writing, go and buy a good bottle of wine, make yourself a decent meal, listen to a great album while you're cooking, watch something you'll enjoy on DVD.

Jane said...

Thanks M. I can't believe how desolate I feel. It's really because there have been months of this to-ing and fro-ing. I would seriously suggest you find yourself an in-house producer. They get 80% of the output. The competition is insane and a producer once told me 'off the record' that because they have to fill the in-house quota of 80%, it has meant having to turn down indie proposals that are actually far superior.